Scared spitless...

Only twenty-four days left in the month. Just enough time to pack up my old life and move into a new one. We spent the weekend packing, cleaning and doing moverly activities. I surfed the web for new homes, jobs, et cetera. Today, a realtor called to get a better idea of what we're looking for. That's almost like having someone ask what you want for Christmas. What do you say? If you eat every day and have clothes to wear and a shelter to keep you warm at night, what else do you need? Can you tell I suck at answering the Christmas question? I was proud of myself for being able to describe concisely what we need. Now, we'll see how it goes. This coming weekend will be the moment of truth.

In other news, I haven't really spent much time writing. I've been crazy exhausted, and am now sick with what appears to be the beginning of bronchitis. As I don't have time for sickness right now, I'm fighting like a mad woman to keep my body working right. I have one contest entry left to judge--woo hoo! It's all finally winding down.

I keep saying I'm scared. It's like a running theme in my life lately. Actually, I'm not scared so much as nervous, frustrated and anxious. What if I fail? That question spins on a loop in the back of my mind. For the most part, my brain is quiet and lets me forget my fear of floundering. Sometimes, though, like when I'm sick and a captive of my bed, the negativity screams in my head. I can't afford to fail, and I've never been a quitter, so the loop needs to just shut up! I will be fine, my family will be fine, and this episode will become one of life's little benchmarks.

I've left my characters hanging, and I have to wonder if they've moved on without me or if they're having a bit of an intermission while I get my act together. I can just see them pacing the pages, taking a cigarette break, hoping to God I'll finish what I started. Poor guys! And now I've added something else to my cache of distractions--crocheting. I haven't done it in years, needed a scarf, and thought it would be great to make my own. Maybe if I'm feeling super brave, I'll post a picture of it when it's finished.

What do you do when life yanks the rug from under you?